Well, I did it, I signed my life away! I am locked into a year contract with a gym. It is really really expensive and I hesitated to go for it... but I knew that it was the only way to get me committed to doing it. If it was cheap, I would never go. The best thing about it is that it includes the pool. I am a fish and I love the water!
So, today I am going to look for a swimming suit, this might be the most difficult task for the entire year. Finding a swimming suit for a girl my size isn't the easiest task in Brazil. In the USA it is difficult for other reasons, my size is usually the first sold in the states. In Brazil, I am lucky if they make my size. Anyway, about to change that I hope :) I am totally excited about it. They have so many classes I want to participate in, like boxing :D he he he!
I am sure this is not the last time you hear about the gym, it is a year contract after all. :-)
--- Update: Expensive doesn't necessarily mean commitment--- Ooops!
Passwords
Fromses nowses onses, Ises haveses decidedeses thatses Ises willses ignorses theses socialses ruleses andses continueses toses makeses funses ofses peopleses whoses talkses funnyses. Thereses onceses waseses a dayses in whichses I metses a boyses, and the boyses madeses me very confuseses. I couldn'tses understanses thatses heses waseses speakingses Englisheses untilses I realizedeses that he wases addingses "ses" toses everyses wordeses.
Weekend clicked
It is simple, it just clicked. My weekend was so nice and I felt so relaxed. You know when things just click? Like when everything is just in a really good rhythm? I spent two days relaxing with friends and enjoying nature. We stayed up late talking about everything under the sun (and then some). I love moments like that! I wish it didn't have to end, but reality is that work starts early tomorrow.
Genuine happiness! Thanks!
Genuine happiness! Thanks!
Truth just around the corner...
I read the post today on Seth Godin's blog. It is about taking a closer look at your business, and if your business is one that is willing to take a look in the mirror to see its flaws or if you are willing to just go with the status quo.
I particularly like the imagery he draws when he says:
"Sometimes, we get close to finding out who we really are, what's the status of our situation, what's holding us back. When one of those conversations is going on, do you lean in, eager for more, or do you back off, afraid of what it will mean?"
I immediately saw this "eager leaning in" as something I regularly do for work, but that I don't do on a personal level.
His focus was on businesses and if their owners are willing to see their flaws and actually show interest and make changes. I believe that these changes and acceptance of "critical thinking" should apply all the way down to the individuals involved. This process of taking in the information that others have about us has become intolerable to most people. The opinions of others have become just that, opinions. There is no great effort to "lean in" and listen to what others feel could make us a better person.
Perhaps in our struggle for independence, in our own personal separation from the chaff, we lost the ability to listen to criticism. Perhaps we feel vulnerable when our insides are exposed and protect ourselves from being cut open at any cost. We no longer seek out personal and individual remodeling, when what most of us need is to be gutted out and have the supporting beams replaced with securely cemented foundations. It isn't natural for man to stop redefining his character, so the struggle against nature to remain closed is a tiresome battle that isn't easily won.
I particularly like the imagery he draws when he says:
"Sometimes, we get close to finding out who we really are, what's the status of our situation, what's holding us back. When one of those conversations is going on, do you lean in, eager for more, or do you back off, afraid of what it will mean?"
I immediately saw this "eager leaning in" as something I regularly do for work, but that I don't do on a personal level.
His focus was on businesses and if their owners are willing to see their flaws and actually show interest and make changes. I believe that these changes and acceptance of "critical thinking" should apply all the way down to the individuals involved. This process of taking in the information that others have about us has become intolerable to most people. The opinions of others have become just that, opinions. There is no great effort to "lean in" and listen to what others feel could make us a better person.
Perhaps in our struggle for independence, in our own personal separation from the chaff, we lost the ability to listen to criticism. Perhaps we feel vulnerable when our insides are exposed and protect ourselves from being cut open at any cost. We no longer seek out personal and individual remodeling, when what most of us need is to be gutted out and have the supporting beams replaced with securely cemented foundations. It isn't natural for man to stop redefining his character, so the struggle against nature to remain closed is a tiresome battle that isn't easily won.
I adore you!
Stop and think about it for a minute. If you truly have 850 friends, that would mean that if you were to speak to every single one of them at least once a month (what I would consider very superficial) you would have to see and maintain a relationship with a minimum of 2 people on your list every single day of your life. You wouldn't be able to repeat the visit, because there just isn't enough time to see all of those people and have quality time with them. Okay, so I know the thinking is a bit radical, but I really think that the people with the most friends are actually the loneliest. If you have to maintain a superficial relationship with a lot of people, it must be exhausting and lonely.
What logic did I use to draw my conclusion? I didn't!!! I just think I am right. Ha ha ha!
Actually it was all because of a thought I had about Brazil. One of the most difficult things for me has been how superficial friends are here. I don't really know how to deal with it most of the time. I feel a bit like a fish out of water when it comes to making friends here. I have always been someone who makes a strong connection with my friends and remain that way for very long spaces of time. I grew up in a place where you clearly knew if a person liked you or not. The opposite happened in Brazil, I got so overwhelmed by superficial connections when I moved here, that I just stopped trying to make real friends. I ended up isolating myself and stuck to the few friends I did have.
Brazilians are masters at superficial. Well, they take second place to southern women from the USA. (please no hate mail from either side!)
My first month living here in Brazil, I had maybe 11 people tell me how much they "adored" me. So, you tell me, at what point in ONE MONTH, I could have possibly been worthy of the adoration of 11 people? I swear to you, I didn't rescue any puppies or jump into any fires during that month. To me, adoration is something deep, that you feel for people you truly like. I have only used the word adore or something similar to that with friends on very rare occasions. After I finally realized that most people here put on a production with EVERYONE, I began to understand how superficial things were. I still get confused by it, and really have no clue when someone actually does truly like me. The fact that everyone here is very physical and touchy just confuses me even more and makes me feel a bit like "Max" from "Mary and Max". Like I need to wear a booklet around my neck to interpret what is REALLY going on.
I used to be able to make clear definitions in my mind between a potential good friend and a superficial one. Growing up in the USA you don't have to worry so much about the physical cues being confusing. I mean if a guy held your hand he liked you, if you LET him hold it, then you liked him. If your friend gave you a hug he/she liked you. If he/she hugged you harder you felt the energy and knew the cue of friendship. So, what happens when everyone hugs, everyone kisses, everyone holds hands??? CONFUSION! I can't tell you what a mess it has made of my mind and when I will figure it out. I can't rely anymore on who hugs tighter or who holds on longer. So what do I do? Any ideas? ha ha ha!
I can only assume that by telling everyone you adore them and by being physical with everyone, it could eventually lead to a sense of satisfaction. I guess one could develop a sense of security by thinking that everyone likes you and that you like everyone. FOR ME... it has done the opposite and now I don't think anyone is sincere. Maybe because I wasn't born here or raised that way, I can't quite grasp how it all works. It has caused me to be skeptical and totally blind when a true friend really does show up. So, I am open to any ideas or input... would I really know the difference when a real one does show up? I need a bigger instruction manual here. Ha ha ha! I just have to laugh! Because if you can't rely on social cues then... I have NO IDEA how these people do it!!!
PS. I ADORE YOU! ;)
Wii got the upper hand.
So, most of my family and friends know how active I was before I got Perthes. I was in tap, gymnastics, track and field and skiing. Running was something I absolutely loved doing before I got Perthes. I was one of the fastest in my class and was preparing to compete in the Hershey's track meet when I went into the hospital the first time. I regularly have dreams that I am running or dancing and the freedom I feel when I am doing these activities in my dreams is so powerful. I wake up depressed knowing that it isn't real. I can't say, I gave up on those things because perhaps with a total hip replacement it might still be a possibility.
Just after I got out of my braces (legs), I went overboard trying to do everything I could possibly do and pushed my physical limits to the absolute edge. I went climbing, rappelling, skiing, snowboarding... you name it and I at least tried it. Of course there were many disappointments, like when I tried to water-ski. I can't keep my legs together long enough to get up out of the water. I tried it several times, and ended up just being towed around on a big old whale floater. I think over time, things started getting more and more difficult as I abused the limits of my body. I now have more pain in my knees than I do in my hips.
So bringing this back around to last night, I was again reminded of my limitations when I couldn't physically move my legs off the ground. I was at a friends place playing Just Dance on the Wii. It was difficult to even allow myself to try, because every time I was required to move my feet, I would feel the pain shooting through my hips. I know this will get better as I lose weight, and this is my number one goal. I need to have more freedom, I need to be able to feel that running is a possibility.
So....
Dear Wii, you got the upper hand last night,
Sitting there all smug with your superior plight.
Look over your shoulder my little friend.
Because my discontent will be your end!
Winter Wonderland
I can't say I haven't felt the winter at all this year in Brazil, because I have. Just a few weeks ago, the weather was really cold and because it isn't normal to have a heater, my feet felt like little Popsicle for a week straight. I have been lucky enough though to avoid the viruses going around and I just got a slight sinus infection (knock on wood). I would like to keep it that way and not get sick this year.
If it does get any colder, I think I will find a small room at work,turn on the heater, curl up in a corner and hibernate. How funny would that be... Students, please ignore the lump in the corner, that is just the American in hibernation . Put a sign on me (please don't poke the American in hibernation).
I am a ninja!
Something made me laugh really hard in class the other night. I was playing the audio CD for the class to check their book work. I played it the first time around and one of my students started erasing the answers she had written down in her book. I then played the tape a second time and she put up her hand and said... "Wait just a minute please! I was right the first time." I looked at her and smiled, she looked back at me with a really confused face and said... "The first time you played it, the man said something different than what he said this time." Her face was totally serious, so I knew she really felt she had been cheated or something. I sat there in silence waiting for her to realize that this is a CD and I couldn't have possibly changed the answers between playing it the first time and playing it the second time. What the man on the tape said the first time is exactly what he said the second time. After a 20 to 30 second pause and some awkward silence. she was still looking at me as if I had done something wrong. Another student of mine broke the silence by saying "Yes, teacher got up, took the CD out of the player, replaced it with a false one, sat back down and hit play again, just to confuse you". I couldn't help it... I busted up laughing and backed what he said up with "My ninja skills are awesome". I was almost rolling on the floor in laughter. It was so funny and in the end she finally realized how silly it sounded ... Poor girl! she knows I love her! ... I hope ;)
Good Luck... on your wedding day.
One of my students reminded me yesterday of a conversation I had with her a few months ago. It was about a phrase that is commonly used in Brazil for weddings. Every time I think of this conversation it makes me laugh a bit. I find these slight cultural differences really facilitating and entertain most of the time.
We were talking about the phrase "good luck". She had mentioned to me that she says "good luck" to a bride and groom. I said "hold up". I need to get this straight in my head. "You wished the bride and groom good luck?" I asked. She then told me that it was very common to say this to a bride and groom. I still couldn't get this phrase to settle in my head as a good thing to say to a newly married couple.
The image that this phrase in the context of a wedding night brings to my head is not good. I was trying to picture in my mind being at a wedding. I go to hug the bride and groom and then cross my fingers and tell them "good luck". To me, telling someone "good luck" on the wedding day, translates into something other than I wish you happiness in your life. It roughly translates in my mind to, "wow you are brave" and "I wouldn't do it myself but good luck in your courageous dive into the deep end of the pool". I could just imagine my best friend glancing over at my spouse and saying "good luck". Oh the image makes me laugh.
Apparently in a culture where sarcasm isn't widely used nor understood, the term "Boa Sorte" or "Good Luck" is perfectly fine and normal to use at a wedding. So... Good Luck all you newlyweds out there!!! ... nope, sorry I still can't say it without feeling the sarcasm in the phrase.
Brazil vs. USA (Cultural Differences)
I’ve been mulling over where I should pick this blog back up. I have shown a lot of information about food and traditions here in Brazil but I think this blog is in desperate need of some cultural and social comparisons with the country I was born.
Here they are and in no rational order.Oh and please keep in mind that these are just my opinions!!!
USA | BRAZIL |
I will do it alone | We will do it together |
Omit the truth = Liar Liar Pants On Fire! | Omit the truth= Harmony and Peace |
No! | Let’s see, well, perhaps, Maybe |
Confront me= bring it on, I could use some good advice. | Confront me= You are being rude to me. |
Tell me exactly what you expect me to do, or how you would like me to react. | Ambiguous communication to put across and ever expanding range of emotional responses. |
The social protocol is the same for everyone. | Members of different social groups have different social protocol. |
Authority= you have earned it. | Authority = anyone older, more educated or richer than me. And the police are exempt from consideration. |
Go out and earn a living my child. | Stay home and help me out a bit longer. |
Be fruitful and multiply (in your own home) | Be semi-fruitful and multiply once or perhaps twice (in our home). |
Grandma and Grandpa can be found in room 3382A at the local nursing home. | Grandma and Grandpa can be found down the hall on the right, just past Mom and Dad’s room. |
Let’s have a BBQ = Just the immediate family and maybe a few friends. | Let’s have a BBQ= Anyone who has our blood running though their veins and all of their neighbors. Oh and don’t forget the family pets as well. |
Beer= Let’s get drunk. | Beer= Damn it is hot and I am thirsty. |
I alone stand… I alone fall. | We stand together… We fall together. |
Moving out= Get a house in a different city, county and perhaps state. | Moving out= buying the house or apartment a block from Mom’s place. |
18= don’t let the door hit you on the way out. | 18= you have 10 more years to settle down with a partner and get married. After that, we will talk about buying you the house next door. |
Not making it to parent teacher conference= you don’t love or support your child nor his/her education. | Not making it to parent teacher conference= you probably had the best of intention but Aunt Carolina came for coffee just as you were grabbing your keys to leave. |
Billy is going to be expelled from school= I am taking my lawyer with me to the meeting. | Billy is going to be expelled from school= He probably deserves what punishment they give him. I will admit fault and they will go easy on him. |
If your voice is loud= you are being aggressive and screaming at me. | If your voice is loud= what do you mean my voice is loud… this is how I normally talk. |
Party time: from 6:00 – 12:30 | Party time: What??? Nobody can tell me when the party stops!!! If it’s over, come to my place and we will continue. |
I need some sun.
What is up with all the clouds? It has been cloudy for almost a full week and a half. There was a tiny ray of sun that came through the clouds the day before yesterday and it felt so weird. I was sitting in the car waiting for a friend of mine to come out of his dentist appointment, when my arm started to itch. I looked down and there was one little strip of light that was running across my arm. I looked at the street and there was no other place it was hitting. It felt weird to think that quite possibly I was the only person in the whole city who felt the sun that whole day. Is it possible? Weird if I was. Almost as weird and impossible as being the only one awake in the entire city at one given time. That would feel really weird I think. Hmmm now my mind is wandering. I should bring it back.
So, Brazil without sun is a little depressing, but I am sure soon enough I am going to be begging for the clouds and rain.
So, Brazil without sun is a little depressing, but I am sure soon enough I am going to be begging for the clouds and rain.
I swear I have not stopped.
I swear I am not done writing in this blog. I have just had a lot of things going on this last month. I will be back this week just as before. So... please stay tuned :)
Happy (belated) Independence day Brazil.
I know I am a day late... but I just want to wish Brazil a Happy Independence day!
Brazil gained independence from Portugal on 7 September 1822, when Dom Pedro I, stood his ground against the rule of the portuguese king.
Here is a little bit from wikipedia about the event.
When King JoĂŁo VI finally returned to Portugal, in the early 1820s, most of the privileges that had been accorded to Brazil were rescinded, sparking the ire of local nationalists. Pedro, who had remained in the country as regent, sided with the nationalist element and even supported the Portuguese Constitutionalist movement that led to the revolt in Porto in 1820. When pressed by the Portuguese court to return, he refused. For that, he was demoted from regent to a mere representative of the Lisbon court in Brazil. This news reached him on 7 September 1822, when he had just arrived in SĂŁo Paulo, from a visit to the port of Santos. On the banks of the Ipiranga River, he unsheathed his sword, removed the blue and white Portuguese shield from his coat, and declared "Independence or death!" This later became his famous speech O grito do Ipiranga (The Cry of Ipiranga). He was proclaimed Emperor of Brazil on 12 October his 24th birthday, and crowned on December 1.
There would still be a few years of battles before the portuguese finally surrendered , but this does go once again to show you how the actions of one man can change the lives of so many people.
Happy Independence day Brazil!
Brazil gained independence from Portugal on 7 September 1822, when Dom Pedro I, stood his ground against the rule of the portuguese king.
Here is a little bit from wikipedia about the event.
When King JoĂŁo VI finally returned to Portugal, in the early 1820s, most of the privileges that had been accorded to Brazil were rescinded, sparking the ire of local nationalists. Pedro, who had remained in the country as regent, sided with the nationalist element and even supported the Portuguese Constitutionalist movement that led to the revolt in Porto in 1820. When pressed by the Portuguese court to return, he refused. For that, he was demoted from regent to a mere representative of the Lisbon court in Brazil. This news reached him on 7 September 1822, when he had just arrived in SĂŁo Paulo, from a visit to the port of Santos. On the banks of the Ipiranga River, he unsheathed his sword, removed the blue and white Portuguese shield from his coat, and declared "Independence or death!" This later became his famous speech O grito do Ipiranga (The Cry of Ipiranga). He was proclaimed Emperor of Brazil on 12 October his 24th birthday, and crowned on December 1.
There would still be a few years of battles before the portuguese finally surrendered , but this does go once again to show you how the actions of one man can change the lives of so many people.
Happy Independence day Brazil!
I took the week off... sorry!
I took a week off from blogging, not because I had something important to do, but because I didn’t feel much like writing last week. I woke up this morning feeling a lot better and decided to go ahead and get this out of my way. I have done quite a bit this morning in the short hour I have been awake. I don’t usually find the energy to get going right away, but I did today.
* cleaned bird poop off the wall,
* threw the blankets the dog peed on in the wash
* cleaned up dog poop from the sun room.
Actually come to think of it, the whole time was spent cleaning up pet messes. I guess that must be just a little of what it feels like to be a mom, you wake up to clean up the mess from yesterday. I am not complaining, just wish these animals more control of where they decide to relieve themselves.
* cleaned bird poop off the wall,
* threw the blankets the dog peed on in the wash
* cleaned up dog poop from the sun room.
Actually come to think of it, the whole time was spent cleaning up pet messes. I guess that must be just a little of what it feels like to be a mom, you wake up to clean up the mess from yesterday. I am not complaining, just wish these animals more control of where they decide to relieve themselves.
Follow up to... "Visiting a Dr. in Brazil"
I feel I have hit a milestone, that’s right… I am so darn proud of myself that it has come to this. When your blog actually gets readers, there comes along with those readers, questions or concerns about a topic. It will happen on occasion (but hopefully not very often) that you have to retract, adjust, explain or make less complicated something you have posted. So, I have hit that milestone (applause). I have found it necessary to EXPLAIN a bit more about the post titled “Visiting a Dr. in Brazil”.
Here were the issues that a few readers brought to my attention, and I feel that some things need clarification, not justification, just plain old clarification.
The example I gave of a “regular” Dr. office visit in the USA, was based on my “Personal” experience. I NEVER once had a consultation at a Dr.'s office that was a converted home. In fact, the only time I had any type of appointment in a home was when I was taking piano lessons ( a nightmare I would like to forget). So, I was speaking based on experience. As was mentioned by a reader, in the past, there were a lot of homes that were Dr.'s offices. So, for people my parents age, it must not seem as strange, but as things develop you would naturally assume that as people see the “Office” advance to structures such as clinics built as clinics and not as homes. With the change, you would expect to see attitudes change as well, and even though the service provided is of the same level, you would see a prejudice or preference for something that “feels” modern. Or am I wrong?
This might not be the best example, but when I was back home visiting family last November, and I was riding home from the flea market with my brothers. My brother's phone rang and his little girl was on the phone. She was all excited about getting this “Old Fashioned” candy bar. She told him all about it, how it came in a foil wrapper and how cool that was. It turned out it was a Symphony Bar… the very same candy we ate as teenagers. To us, it was a bar we ate as kids, yet to her it was this “old fashioned” candy and it was so different that it was exciting to her to experience eating it. So, I guess you could say that the experience of sitting in a converted home, waiting to be called to the old kitchen to see the Dr. was like me holding an “old fashioned” candy bar. It was so strange, interesting… but will I like it? Is it as good? I don’t know… because I have never experienced it.
The second clarification I need to make is about the Brazilian example I gave. I had a comment from a Brazilian who said… “I have never had a Dr.'s appointment in a home, that makes it sound really bad. “. I then stopped to think about why my experience would be so entirely different from that of a Brazilian. I mean, I have been to about 15 different doctors and all but one was in a house. I then realized that there must be something about the way a Brazilian sees the building. I think they are viewing it as a clinic because that is what they know. It doesn't remind them of a home. I hope I was clear with one thing though, the doctor does not work from home, but the office is a converted home. That means, at some point the place was used as a home or was built as a home originally. At some point the home went through renovations to become an office. I guess though to a Brazilian this isn't always as evident as it is to someone who is not used to it.
As I sit here writing this, I am waiting for Mariana outside of an “office”. The office was obviously once a home, you can tell it is a home because there is a bathtub in the bathroom. And believe me… a bathtub in a home in Brazil is a rare thing, so in a Dr.'s office, it is an even stranger fixture. I look up the street and there are 6 Doctor's offices and every single one of them is in a home. They are Clinics, built in what was once a personal house.
Just like in the USA, depending on the amount of money you have, you can have a completely different experience. In Brazil just like the USA, money talks. If you have nothing, your service is different than if you can pay for a private doctor to give you bedside treatment in your own home.
In Brazil they have had free public health care (I will post about it some other time, since it is a topic that is interesting to me. ) as well as expensive private insurance. If you have money, you can afford modern and advanced health-care. However, that does NOT take away from the FACT that MANY doctors still practice from CONVERTED homes.
One last point I would like to clarify is when I talked about Dr.’s not giving proper examinations. I have walked away from several appointments feeling like the doctor only listened and did not look. That is MY experience. I have also had the same problem in the states on occasion. I do have two really good doctors who do a complete exam each time I go to the office. That type of treatment is what I am used to from doctors. I didn’t mean that all doctors only listen and don’t examine, It all depends on the quality of Dr. I recently went to a stomach doctor (the same one who sent me for a colonoscopy) and she never once sat me on her table to push, poke or do any type of exam. It was all verbal. However the first stomach doctor I went to was very good and did a complete exam. So, each doctor is a separate case.
So, in all of this… I just want to make it very clear, I don’t feel like there is a lack of education or lack of experience with doctors here. If you get sick in Brazil, you are going to have a good level of care, you won’t be left to die or have to worry any more or less about malpractice. It is just a different experience for me, and sort of like holding that “old fashioned” candy bar… it‘s “old fashioned“ nature makes it something "new" for me to experience.
Here were the issues that a few readers brought to my attention, and I feel that some things need clarification, not justification, just plain old clarification.
The example I gave of a “regular” Dr. office visit in the USA, was based on my “Personal” experience. I NEVER once had a consultation at a Dr.'s office that was a converted home. In fact, the only time I had any type of appointment in a home was when I was taking piano lessons ( a nightmare I would like to forget). So, I was speaking based on experience. As was mentioned by a reader, in the past, there were a lot of homes that were Dr.'s offices. So, for people my parents age, it must not seem as strange, but as things develop you would naturally assume that as people see the “Office” advance to structures such as clinics built as clinics and not as homes. With the change, you would expect to see attitudes change as well, and even though the service provided is of the same level, you would see a prejudice or preference for something that “feels” modern. Or am I wrong?
This might not be the best example, but when I was back home visiting family last November, and I was riding home from the flea market with my brothers. My brother's phone rang and his little girl was on the phone. She was all excited about getting this “Old Fashioned” candy bar. She told him all about it, how it came in a foil wrapper and how cool that was. It turned out it was a Symphony Bar… the very same candy we ate as teenagers. To us, it was a bar we ate as kids, yet to her it was this “old fashioned” candy and it was so different that it was exciting to her to experience eating it. So, I guess you could say that the experience of sitting in a converted home, waiting to be called to the old kitchen to see the Dr. was like me holding an “old fashioned” candy bar. It was so strange, interesting… but will I like it? Is it as good? I don’t know… because I have never experienced it.
The second clarification I need to make is about the Brazilian example I gave. I had a comment from a Brazilian who said… “I have never had a Dr.'s appointment in a home, that makes it sound really bad. “. I then stopped to think about why my experience would be so entirely different from that of a Brazilian. I mean, I have been to about 15 different doctors and all but one was in a house. I then realized that there must be something about the way a Brazilian sees the building. I think they are viewing it as a clinic because that is what they know. It doesn't remind them of a home. I hope I was clear with one thing though, the doctor does not work from home, but the office is a converted home. That means, at some point the place was used as a home or was built as a home originally. At some point the home went through renovations to become an office. I guess though to a Brazilian this isn't always as evident as it is to someone who is not used to it.
As I sit here writing this, I am waiting for Mariana outside of an “office”. The office was obviously once a home, you can tell it is a home because there is a bathtub in the bathroom. And believe me… a bathtub in a home in Brazil is a rare thing, so in a Dr.'s office, it is an even stranger fixture. I look up the street and there are 6 Doctor's offices and every single one of them is in a home. They are Clinics, built in what was once a personal house.
Just like in the USA, depending on the amount of money you have, you can have a completely different experience. In Brazil just like the USA, money talks. If you have nothing, your service is different than if you can pay for a private doctor to give you bedside treatment in your own home.
In Brazil they have had free public health care (I will post about it some other time, since it is a topic that is interesting to me. ) as well as expensive private insurance. If you have money, you can afford modern and advanced health-care. However, that does NOT take away from the FACT that MANY doctors still practice from CONVERTED homes.
One last point I would like to clarify is when I talked about Dr.’s not giving proper examinations. I have walked away from several appointments feeling like the doctor only listened and did not look. That is MY experience. I have also had the same problem in the states on occasion. I do have two really good doctors who do a complete exam each time I go to the office. That type of treatment is what I am used to from doctors. I didn’t mean that all doctors only listen and don’t examine, It all depends on the quality of Dr. I recently went to a stomach doctor (the same one who sent me for a colonoscopy) and she never once sat me on her table to push, poke or do any type of exam. It was all verbal. However the first stomach doctor I went to was very good and did a complete exam. So, each doctor is a separate case.
So, in all of this… I just want to make it very clear, I don’t feel like there is a lack of education or lack of experience with doctors here. If you get sick in Brazil, you are going to have a good level of care, you won’t be left to die or have to worry any more or less about malpractice. It is just a different experience for me, and sort of like holding that “old fashioned” candy bar… it‘s “old fashioned“ nature makes it something "new" for me to experience.
Medical tests update.
I have now completed the mountain of tests I had to take to find out what is causing pain in the abdomen as well as dizziness. I have not seen the doctor but I have been able to look at some of the test results.
Ultrasound - shows multiple microcysts in both ovaries, a grade 3 tipped uterus that is putting pressure on the colon and tailbone (might explain some issues).
MRI- have not got the results back.
Hearing and balance test: Nothing wrong with my hearing or any of the other 15 things they checked that day. They put a gun in my ear that shot hot and cold air as well as noise and that made me soooooo dizzy and I was sick the whole next day.
Colonoscopy- I suffered a lot during the 48 hours of liquid diet, the test part was a breeze. They found a polyp that has been removed and is being sent for tests.
So, what I have left to do is the Endometriosis tests. As well as get the results back from the MRI and one other exam I did.
Conclusion- I don't have one yet, but I will let you know when I do.
Ultrasound - shows multiple microcysts in both ovaries, a grade 3 tipped uterus that is putting pressure on the colon and tailbone (might explain some issues).
MRI- have not got the results back.
Hearing and balance test: Nothing wrong with my hearing or any of the other 15 things they checked that day. They put a gun in my ear that shot hot and cold air as well as noise and that made me soooooo dizzy and I was sick the whole next day.
Colonoscopy- I suffered a lot during the 48 hours of liquid diet, the test part was a breeze. They found a polyp that has been removed and is being sent for tests.
So, what I have left to do is the Endometriosis tests. As well as get the results back from the MRI and one other exam I did.
Conclusion- I don't have one yet, but I will let you know when I do.
Phonetics.... my nightmare!
So, here is something personal, not a lot of people know about me... I am was terrible at English phonetics!
I was reminded of this the other day when I realized that my spelling in Portuguese is much better than my spelling in English. I also find Portuguese Phonetics much easier than English. I really don't know what part of my brain wasn't working in grade school, but it was such a nightmare for me.
In grade school, I had to attend special classes for a few hours a day because I had a little bit of dyslexia as well as I was having a big issue with phonetics. It was more ammunition for the kids who were already taunting me about my leg braces. I got a lot of snickers and heckles about having to leave class for a few hours to attend the "special" class. It was difficult and I hated being called out of class like that, but it was worth it. I ended up having to learn to read by the EVIL "sight words". I had to memorize what a word looked like in order to know what it was. I could not just "sound it out" as I was being told to do. Learning to read this way did complicate things for a while, when a word I had never seen would appear, I was lost. I guess my brain adjusted over the few years I was attending the class and both the dyslexia and the phonetic issues dissipated. I could phonetically sound things out, but sight words were the start I needed.
So, 20 years later and I am speaking my 3rd language and I am starting to realize that the phonetics of English language are much more difficult than both Spanish and Portuguese. Portuguese doesn't have the massive list of rules for decoding the phonetics like English does. When I use phonetics in Portuguese, it makes sense! I think English Phonetics are complicated by the foreign language influences. We have adopted so many foreign words and changed the spellings to fit our own tongue that they become difficult to identify, pronounce and spell, we then have to create phonetic decoding rules to adjust. Phonetics in the English language work, but only to a certain extent. You step beyond the basic English words and things get very complicated and letter combination in one word can sound completely different in another word.
Portuguese is a difficult language to learn, but I can attest to it being phonetically easier than English... and that is about it.
I was reminded of this the other day when I realized that my spelling in Portuguese is much better than my spelling in English. I also find Portuguese Phonetics much easier than English. I really don't know what part of my brain wasn't working in grade school, but it was such a nightmare for me.
In grade school, I had to attend special classes for a few hours a day because I had a little bit of dyslexia as well as I was having a big issue with phonetics. It was more ammunition for the kids who were already taunting me about my leg braces. I got a lot of snickers and heckles about having to leave class for a few hours to attend the "special" class. It was difficult and I hated being called out of class like that, but it was worth it. I ended up having to learn to read by the EVIL "sight words". I had to memorize what a word looked like in order to know what it was. I could not just "sound it out" as I was being told to do. Learning to read this way did complicate things for a while, when a word I had never seen would appear, I was lost. I guess my brain adjusted over the few years I was attending the class and both the dyslexia and the phonetic issues dissipated. I could phonetically sound things out, but sight words were the start I needed.
So, 20 years later and I am speaking my 3rd language and I am starting to realize that the phonetics of English language are much more difficult than both Spanish and Portuguese. Portuguese doesn't have the massive list of rules for decoding the phonetics like English does. When I use phonetics in Portuguese, it makes sense! I think English Phonetics are complicated by the foreign language influences. We have adopted so many foreign words and changed the spellings to fit our own tongue that they become difficult to identify, pronounce and spell, we then have to create phonetic decoding rules to adjust. Phonetics in the English language work, but only to a certain extent. You step beyond the basic English words and things get very complicated and letter combination in one word can sound completely different in another word.
Portuguese is a difficult language to learn, but I can attest to it being phonetically easier than English... and that is about it.
Visiting a Dr. in Brazil.
I thought about writing this a few times, but I was afraid I wouldn't be able to articulate exactly what it is like to visit a doctor in Brazil. There are so many things that are different and the whole experience is something you must try yourself to appreciate the differences in how things are done.
My first experience at a doctor's office here in Brazil was quite strange. I felt really uncomfortable with the whole experience and was not really sure what to think. I had many illnesses as a child and when I developed Legg- Calvé- Perthes syndrome, I spent a whole lot of time in and out of the doctor's office. I think my experience with the medical world as a child, made it much more difficult to accept the differences in the way things are done here in Brazil.
I think a typical American experience at the Dr's office goes something like this... ( maybe my Brazilian friends might find this different) You make an appointment with the Dr. who is a general practitioner. You arrive at the clinic (generally a building specific for the doctor or a group of doctors) and announce your arrival at the reception desk. You wait in a large and usually spacious waiting room, fill out your forms (if there are any to fill out). There might be a small play area for the kids as well as chairs for the adults. You are then called back to the doctors area, where you enter one of several exam rooms. You wait in the exam room until the doctor sees you. Sometimes your wait in the exam room can take as long as the wait in the waiting room. The Dr, comes in (usually you are sitting on the bed or in a chair) he sits on his little chair in front of you. If there is a desk it is usually up against a wall and not usually used as a barrier between him and the patient. The Dr. spends most of his time next to you, asking questions and examining you. Then he either orders some tests or writes a prescription. If he orders tests, most of the time the x-ray's and blood work are taken in the same office on the same day. If it is an exam which allows you to have results in a few minutes, he will send you off to do that. You will then return to the room and wait for him to return with your result. You get the results and any prescriptions or medical preparations are given at the moment. If you need to see a specialist, you are given a referral at that time. You leave the room walking past all the other patients rooms where the doctor has now returned to attending. The doctor usually has several rooms with patients and he/she goes from one room to another attending several patients in the hour.
The Brazilian Dr. Office experiences that I have had. You need to make a general guess of what you think your problem might be. Look up a specialist in that area (whom your insurance works with), make an appointment. If they are a good doctor, you can expect a few weeks to months of wait. If you have no clue what your problem is, you go to a general practitioner for them to guess it for you.
You arrive at the clinic but instead of the idea of a special building, most clinics are just regular homes (see image) that have the rooms inside equipt with the medical equipment. This was something difficult for me, It was very different to be walking into a house and not a clinic. Then you speak to the receptionist and are seated in a small waiting room. Usually the living room or even entry way of a small house. Then you are called back to see the doctor. The doctor is always seated behind a desk and contact with the doctor is minimal. You are the only patient he has at the time, and there is only one office where he has patients in and out of. You talk about your issues with the doctor and he goes on typing or writing what you say. Then, he might or might not examine you, based on what he thinks it might be. You will then receive a prescription or an order for tests. Most offices do not have the x-ray machines or any diagnosing equipment, so you must go to a third source to take these tests. You can talk about any and all of your medical problems with the specialist and they will treat or send you to be treated for each thing. For example, I went to an endocrinologist and she then told me who I should see for my skin problems as well as my hip problems. The following visits with the endocrinologist included me giving her updates on those other issues as well. So, there is no need to make separate appointments to speak about separate issues.
You take your prescriptions and requests for blood work or x-rays to the third source (usually a specialized clinic in diagnostics). You then wait for several days for the results. You pick up the results and take them to your next scheduled appointment with your doctor.
One interesting thing that never happened to me in the USA is that I am the one who keeps all my x-rays and all my exam results. The doctor only looks at them, makes notes and then returns them to me before I leave the office. I have a little stack of all my exams an x-rays here in my closet. No need to ask the doctor for a medical history report.
So, the things that were very difficult for me. The office being a home can seem very informal and can cause you to make a judgment about the doctor based on the condition of the home. I have only one Dr. who I see in an actual clinic that was built for that purpose, the rest are all in converted homes. I mean, seriously... the only doctors I knew who did work from a house were the doctors who lost their license and were hiding the practice. Another issue is the doctor sitting behind a desk and not very interactive with the patient during the consultation. This can seem a little intimidating and a bit formal. I also don't like having to get my exams done by a 3rd source and not being able to walk down the hall to get my x-ray done.
Things I like. I like that the doctor has devoted attention to me, he isn't running off to attend another patient down the hall, and I don't wait for him, he waits for me. I like that I don't need a referral, I can go straight to the specialist (if you know what your problem is this can cut down several weeks of waiting to solve the issue). I like that I get to keep my exam results and I like that I can take a look at them any old time I want. It comes in handy when I try to explain to people that I have less than half my hip left. Somehow an x-ray is worth a thousand words in that case.
So, tell me what you think? Would these things bug you? Would you be able to take a doctor seriously if you were being attended in a converted bedroom, bathroom, kitchen?
My first experience at a doctor's office here in Brazil was quite strange. I felt really uncomfortable with the whole experience and was not really sure what to think. I had many illnesses as a child and when I developed Legg- Calvé- Perthes syndrome, I spent a whole lot of time in and out of the doctor's office. I think my experience with the medical world as a child, made it much more difficult to accept the differences in the way things are done here in Brazil.
I think a typical American experience at the Dr's office goes something like this... ( maybe my Brazilian friends might find this different) You make an appointment with the Dr. who is a general practitioner. You arrive at the clinic (generally a building specific for the doctor or a group of doctors) and announce your arrival at the reception desk. You wait in a large and usually spacious waiting room, fill out your forms (if there are any to fill out). There might be a small play area for the kids as well as chairs for the adults. You are then called back to the doctors area, where you enter one of several exam rooms. You wait in the exam room until the doctor sees you. Sometimes your wait in the exam room can take as long as the wait in the waiting room. The Dr, comes in (usually you are sitting on the bed or in a chair) he sits on his little chair in front of you. If there is a desk it is usually up against a wall and not usually used as a barrier between him and the patient. The Dr. spends most of his time next to you, asking questions and examining you. Then he either orders some tests or writes a prescription. If he orders tests, most of the time the x-ray's and blood work are taken in the same office on the same day. If it is an exam which allows you to have results in a few minutes, he will send you off to do that. You will then return to the room and wait for him to return with your result. You get the results and any prescriptions or medical preparations are given at the moment. If you need to see a specialist, you are given a referral at that time. You leave the room walking past all the other patients rooms where the doctor has now returned to attending. The doctor usually has several rooms with patients and he/she goes from one room to another attending several patients in the hour.
The Brazilian Dr. Office experiences that I have had. You need to make a general guess of what you think your problem might be. Look up a specialist in that area (whom your insurance works with), make an appointment. If they are a good doctor, you can expect a few weeks to months of wait. If you have no clue what your problem is, you go to a general practitioner for them to guess it for you.
| Doctors Office. |
| Waiting Room. |
| The Doctors Consultation. |
You take your prescriptions and requests for blood work or x-rays to the third source (usually a specialized clinic in diagnostics). You then wait for several days for the results. You pick up the results and take them to your next scheduled appointment with your doctor.
One interesting thing that never happened to me in the USA is that I am the one who keeps all my x-rays and all my exam results. The doctor only looks at them, makes notes and then returns them to me before I leave the office. I have a little stack of all my exams an x-rays here in my closet. No need to ask the doctor for a medical history report.
So, the things that were very difficult for me. The office being a home can seem very informal and can cause you to make a judgment about the doctor based on the condition of the home. I have only one Dr. who I see in an actual clinic that was built for that purpose, the rest are all in converted homes. I mean, seriously... the only doctors I knew who did work from a house were the doctors who lost their license and were hiding the practice. Another issue is the doctor sitting behind a desk and not very interactive with the patient during the consultation. This can seem a little intimidating and a bit formal. I also don't like having to get my exams done by a 3rd source and not being able to walk down the hall to get my x-ray done.
Things I like. I like that the doctor has devoted attention to me, he isn't running off to attend another patient down the hall, and I don't wait for him, he waits for me. I like that I don't need a referral, I can go straight to the specialist (if you know what your problem is this can cut down several weeks of waiting to solve the issue). I like that I get to keep my exam results and I like that I can take a look at them any old time I want. It comes in handy when I try to explain to people that I have less than half my hip left. Somehow an x-ray is worth a thousand words in that case.
So, tell me what you think? Would these things bug you? Would you be able to take a doctor seriously if you were being attended in a converted bedroom, bathroom, kitchen?
Only read if you have a strong stomach.
Here is where my personal life is going to get really mixed up in my blog.
I have had a battery of tests the past few days and tomorrow evening it will all end with a bang as I get my first ever colonoscopy. I was given a piece of paper that told me what I have to do to prepare my bowls. The last time I ate was last night and I won't be eating anything solid again until almost 48 hours later. I think the thing that scares me the most is not the exam (since I will be sedated for that it doesn't scare me) but the preparation. Basically I have to survive on liquids and laxatives for 48 hours.
It makes me wonder... How, when someone gives a hoot, we can make amazing advancements in medical treatment, but when nobody cares, and there is no funding, we are stuck with "whatever works the best". I find it amazing that we can break up kidney stones with lasers, make major heart and organ repairs with keyhole surgery, but I still have to sit on the toilet for 2 days to have someone look at my colon. I could have my hip replaced and be in my recovery bed in the amount of time it takes me to clean out my bowel for someone to have a look.
I guess the whole prospect of 2 days of no eating is the most scary when you have blood sugar issues. I have really bad sugar drops about 2 to 3 hours after I eat. I am really scared I am going to have a drop during the next 48 hours.
I guess I should just stop worrying about it and get on with it... but then again, that just isn't how my head works.
I will see you all later with an update.
I have had a battery of tests the past few days and tomorrow evening it will all end with a bang as I get my first ever colonoscopy. I was given a piece of paper that told me what I have to do to prepare my bowls. The last time I ate was last night and I won't be eating anything solid again until almost 48 hours later. I think the thing that scares me the most is not the exam (since I will be sedated for that it doesn't scare me) but the preparation. Basically I have to survive on liquids and laxatives for 48 hours.
It makes me wonder... How, when someone gives a hoot, we can make amazing advancements in medical treatment, but when nobody cares, and there is no funding, we are stuck with "whatever works the best". I find it amazing that we can break up kidney stones with lasers, make major heart and organ repairs with keyhole surgery, but I still have to sit on the toilet for 2 days to have someone look at my colon. I could have my hip replaced and be in my recovery bed in the amount of time it takes me to clean out my bowel for someone to have a look.
I guess the whole prospect of 2 days of no eating is the most scary when you have blood sugar issues. I have really bad sugar drops about 2 to 3 hours after I eat. I am really scared I am going to have a drop during the next 48 hours.
I guess I should just stop worrying about it and get on with it... but then again, that just isn't how my head works.
I will see you all later with an update.
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