This post somewhat ties in with the post I made about Window Watchers and the social aspect of Brazil.
I remember the first restaurant I went to in Brazil. I was used to the American style of dinning out and fully expected the majority of the conversation to happen during the time we were eating and then for the check to be placed on the table as soon as the waiter saw that we had a few morsels left on our plate. I remember being a bit distressed that the check did not come when I thought it would and thinking that my friends were all sitting there chatting while they waited for the waiter to get around to us. After about an hour, I turned to my friend and mentioned how slow the service was and that the waiter must have forgotten our check. My friend kindly reminded me that I was not in the USA and that Brazilians think it is rude if the waiter gives the check without you asking for it. There is a feeling of being kicked out of the restaurant if the waiter brings the bill before you are ready to leave. After hearing this, I thought to myself that it was a bit silly to think someone was kicking you out if they gave you the check after you finished, up till that point I thought of it as good service. I somewhat patiently sat through another 2 hours of conversation before we finally got up to leave.
It took me several months of going out like this and socializing after meals to finally let go. I had to learn not to think about the poor people standing outside waiting to get in ; not to ask for the check before everyone showed signs of being ready to leave; not to eat too fast, since there was plenty of time.
When I returned home to the USA in 2001, I found that I had been totally “Brazilianized” and when I received the check before I had even finished my meal, I felt offended by this act. I really and truly felt like I was being pushed out of the restaurant to make room for someone else. I find it curious that something as small as WHEN THE CHECK ARRIVES, can mean something so different in two cultures.
The image is at a recent dinner party I attended.
