I will continue this blog about my life here in Brazil but I have also started a new blog called "The Real Me Writes". If you don't want to know what is going on in this head of mine, then DON'T check it out!
http://therealmewrites.blogspot.com/
Pitbull Live From Brazil
Vevo is going to stream Pitbull's concert live tomorrow. Pitbull is here in Brazil for Carnival 2012.
Check it out!
http://pitbull.vevo.com/
Check it out!
http://pitbull.vevo.com/
Residency
Making a promise has never been so confusing.
If someone tells you that they made a promise to not do something, what do you think? Let's just say for example, that you hear someone say that they promised they would not use Facebook. what is the first thing that comes to your mind? I had this happen to me a few weeks ago. In my mind when I heard the person saying they had made a promise, I assumed that they had promised their mother or brother that they wouldn't do the thing they were promising. I, in my ignorance, asked about the promise and my question was met with a look of surprise. I was told that I wasn't allowed to know about the promise. I guess this person assumed I knew what the heck they were talking about. All I could think of is what terrible thing happened that drove someone to make a promise like that.
It actually took me a few days to figure out that it was something similar to giving up for lent. Apparently it was something they promised God or a Saint that they would not partake of, in exchange for that sacrifice they expected something back. Wow, big difference from what was in my mind. The whole "you can't know" attitude made sense after that. I have blown out candles before and made a wish and we all know we can't tell those wishes, but a promise had me very confused.
I was relieved to know that I was not the only one who made this mistake, as another American also assumed that it was a personal promise to family or friends. It just didn't cross my mind that it was a spiritual request. I guess if the person had said they gave it up for lent, I would have understood, but it isn't even lent and the person speaking isn't Catholic... so, that leads me to believe that some of the Catholic traditions are an intrinsic part of Brazilian culture.
This got me thinking about how ingrained the Catholic church is in the Brazilian culture. I thought about how there are things that I say in Portuguese that I would never dream of saying in English. Some of the things that are very common to hear:
Holy Saint Catherine - You say this when you are surprised or baffled by something.
Our Lady of Aparecida- You say this when you are surprised or baffled by something.
Go with God- You say this to the person leaving.
Stay with God- You say when you are leaving, you say this to the person staying.
I believe in God the father almighty - you say when something is shocking and scary (protection)
God Free me - You say this when you don't want something bad to happen.
These are just a few of the expressions I hear every day but would never dream of using them in English. I can and do say them in Portuguese because they mean absolutely nothing to me, they are just a form of expression. It is just a small example of how the Catholic church is a big part of the Brazilian culture.
I wasn't raised in a Catholic culture so sometimes these things just fly over my head.
It actually took me a few days to figure out that it was something similar to giving up for lent. Apparently it was something they promised God or a Saint that they would not partake of, in exchange for that sacrifice they expected something back. Wow, big difference from what was in my mind. The whole "you can't know" attitude made sense after that. I have blown out candles before and made a wish and we all know we can't tell those wishes, but a promise had me very confused.
I was relieved to know that I was not the only one who made this mistake, as another American also assumed that it was a personal promise to family or friends. It just didn't cross my mind that it was a spiritual request. I guess if the person had said they gave it up for lent, I would have understood, but it isn't even lent and the person speaking isn't Catholic... so, that leads me to believe that some of the Catholic traditions are an intrinsic part of Brazilian culture.
This got me thinking about how ingrained the Catholic church is in the Brazilian culture. I thought about how there are things that I say in Portuguese that I would never dream of saying in English. Some of the things that are very common to hear:
Holy Saint Catherine - You say this when you are surprised or baffled by something.
Our Lady of Aparecida- You say this when you are surprised or baffled by something.
Go with God- You say this to the person leaving.
Stay with God- You say when you are leaving, you say this to the person staying.
I believe in God the father almighty - you say when something is shocking and scary (protection)
God Free me - You say this when you don't want something bad to happen.
These are just a few of the expressions I hear every day but would never dream of using them in English. I can and do say them in Portuguese because they mean absolutely nothing to me, they are just a form of expression. It is just a small example of how the Catholic church is a big part of the Brazilian culture.
I wasn't raised in a Catholic culture so sometimes these things just fly over my head.
Wake back up Brazil!
Ok so now that all the drama is out of the way... lets post something positive.
Carnival is coming! Okay so I can't say that I get all excited about it, but I do love the spirit of it all. The first year that I arrived in Brazil and I saw how Brazil "LIVED" Carnival, I started saying that "Brazil goes to sleep at new years and only wakes up again for Carnival" After Carnival is when life in Brazil starts again. This is clearly reflected in the amount of students who show up for class before Carnival compared to after Carnival. So... I am getting prepared for Brazil to wake back up this month!
Carnival is coming! Okay so I can't say that I get all excited about it, but I do love the spirit of it all. The first year that I arrived in Brazil and I saw how Brazil "LIVED" Carnival, I started saying that "Brazil goes to sleep at new years and only wakes up again for Carnival" After Carnival is when life in Brazil starts again. This is clearly reflected in the amount of students who show up for class before Carnival compared to after Carnival. So... I am getting prepared for Brazil to wake back up this month!
Ahem... you should know...
It has been a while since I posted. I just now realized that when I have these long pauses in my writing, it is usually because something crazy is happening in my life. So, as long as I am writing, things are good. If I stop, then you should all take it as a red flag warning.
I can't possibly begin to wrap my head around the events of the last year enough to post an insightful post. So many things happened as I started to transition my life. I have been in a constant state of change and transition over the past year. I would like to thank those people who stood by me and who were understanding as I went through those changes.
I have been working for a while to get myself out of a hole I have been living in. The whole year it felt like I would get my head to the top and someone or something would stomp on my hand and I would lose my grip and slip back in. It hasn't ended (that struggle to improve) but I am finally out of that hole and I got out with the help of one GIANT kick to the stomach. I know that sounds like something that would send you hurling back down the hole, but something amazing happened instead. I felt the pain as the blow was dealt, and instead of doubling over, I stood there and let the pain settle, that is when I was amazed. The pain, once it wasn't coddled, filled my body with adrenalin, the exact stuff I needed to pull myself the rest of the way out of that hole. Now, here I am, looking at the mountain I need to climb but undeniably happy that I am not starting from inside the hole... because that sucker was hard to get out of!
Enough about the hole. I can't give you a rundown of the year so I will just talk about a few things...
I went on vacation in December to see family. I was really happy to see all of my nieces and nephews and I fell in love with all of them again! I wouldn't exchange those moments for anything. The rest of my trip was... well, lets not get into that. I wouldn't be able to articulate the frustration I had on the rest of my trip. I will however say that I had a good time traveling and getting to spend some time with my Mom and sister. Again, I wouldn't exchange those moments for ANYTHING!
I was totally amazed that I didn't gain weight while I was home, I actually lost 4 pounds. Yay for stress! ha ha ha!
I am still in Brazil and still working. Other than that, everything else has changed.
What is different? Everything! I sleep, dream, eat, walk, cry, love, hate, feel, live, work and most of all FEEL different. None of these are for the worse, but all of them are different. I think it is the natural process of growing from the self conscious and co-dependent person I was, into the self confident independent person I am becoming. I don't expect the changes to stop and I don't want them to. I have loved and laughed this year as well as cried and screamed. I don't consider ANY of it a waste of time. Actually, I learned the most from some of the worst moments and in the good moments I was able to recover strength to continue the changes.
I will continue to allow myself to change and to grow and become a better version of myself. BUT and that is a very big BUT... if by chance I have a bad day, week, month or couple of months and I stop in the middle of my climb to the top, stay put and watch, because that pause just means I am gathering strength for a big push.
And to those who say that you shouldn't write anything personal on the internet, I say, my my how very small and inconvenient your world is. If nobody opened up and shared what was inside, some of the greatest movements the world has seen would never have happened. Do you not think that some of the great painters were not telling us about their deepest secrets though the oil and canvas medium? Do you not realize that some of their greatest struggles were made public through this medium and for generations we have learned to FEEL through paintings because of it. Don't be so scared about being judged. No matter how big your secret is, your neighbors will be bigger. If your group of friends will judge you harshly because you express yourself, then you need to find yourself another group of friends. Learn to love your struggles, your quirks, your emotions and your secrets and thank God when you have made peace with them.
------
I have been feeling the urge to write about things that are quite off topic for this blog about my life in Brazil, so I am going to be setting up a blog where I can express myself more freely (oh my! run and hide! ha ha ha) I will let you know when it is ready.
I can't possibly begin to wrap my head around the events of the last year enough to post an insightful post. So many things happened as I started to transition my life. I have been in a constant state of change and transition over the past year. I would like to thank those people who stood by me and who were understanding as I went through those changes.
I have been working for a while to get myself out of a hole I have been living in. The whole year it felt like I would get my head to the top and someone or something would stomp on my hand and I would lose my grip and slip back in. It hasn't ended (that struggle to improve) but I am finally out of that hole and I got out with the help of one GIANT kick to the stomach. I know that sounds like something that would send you hurling back down the hole, but something amazing happened instead. I felt the pain as the blow was dealt, and instead of doubling over, I stood there and let the pain settle, that is when I was amazed. The pain, once it wasn't coddled, filled my body with adrenalin, the exact stuff I needed to pull myself the rest of the way out of that hole. Now, here I am, looking at the mountain I need to climb but undeniably happy that I am not starting from inside the hole... because that sucker was hard to get out of!
Enough about the hole. I can't give you a rundown of the year so I will just talk about a few things...
I went on vacation in December to see family. I was really happy to see all of my nieces and nephews and I fell in love with all of them again! I wouldn't exchange those moments for anything. The rest of my trip was... well, lets not get into that. I wouldn't be able to articulate the frustration I had on the rest of my trip. I will however say that I had a good time traveling and getting to spend some time with my Mom and sister. Again, I wouldn't exchange those moments for ANYTHING!
I was totally amazed that I didn't gain weight while I was home, I actually lost 4 pounds. Yay for stress! ha ha ha!
I am still in Brazil and still working. Other than that, everything else has changed.
What is different? Everything! I sleep, dream, eat, walk, cry, love, hate, feel, live, work and most of all FEEL different. None of these are for the worse, but all of them are different. I think it is the natural process of growing from the self conscious and co-dependent person I was, into the self confident independent person I am becoming. I don't expect the changes to stop and I don't want them to. I have loved and laughed this year as well as cried and screamed. I don't consider ANY of it a waste of time. Actually, I learned the most from some of the worst moments and in the good moments I was able to recover strength to continue the changes.
I will continue to allow myself to change and to grow and become a better version of myself. BUT and that is a very big BUT... if by chance I have a bad day, week, month or couple of months and I stop in the middle of my climb to the top, stay put and watch, because that pause just means I am gathering strength for a big push.
And to those who say that you shouldn't write anything personal on the internet, I say, my my how very small and inconvenient your world is. If nobody opened up and shared what was inside, some of the greatest movements the world has seen would never have happened. Do you not think that some of the great painters were not telling us about their deepest secrets though the oil and canvas medium? Do you not realize that some of their greatest struggles were made public through this medium and for generations we have learned to FEEL through paintings because of it. Don't be so scared about being judged. No matter how big your secret is, your neighbors will be bigger. If your group of friends will judge you harshly because you express yourself, then you need to find yourself another group of friends. Learn to love your struggles, your quirks, your emotions and your secrets and thank God when you have made peace with them.
------
I have been feeling the urge to write about things that are quite off topic for this blog about my life in Brazil, so I am going to be setting up a blog where I can express myself more freely (oh my! run and hide! ha ha ha) I will let you know when it is ready.
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